Survival of the whiniest?

What exactly is $1 trillion dollars? Every time I read that number, I flash back to Dr. Evil's maniacal laugh and signature pinky-to-the-corner-of-the-mouth look in the first Austin Powers movie as he's demanding what he thinks is an exorbitant amount of money from the U.S. government, only to discover that $1 million has become laughably little while he's been out in space. CNN's Christine Romans' analysis of what exactly a trillion-dollar debt means is eye-opening, and a little scary.

Economics is admittedly not one of my strongest subjects (The four classes of it I had to take between high school and college were 585 of my least-enjoyably spent hours ever.), but isn't "rescuing" failing companies sort of counter to the whole idea of a free market economy in a capitalistic society? Isn't the point that the economy and its consumers choose the businesses that succeed through supply and demand, a sort of Darwinism of economics - survival of he who can afford to stay open?

I don't pretend to understand all the details of last year's bailout or the stimulus package currently being debated by the Senate, but what I do know is that it's making me very nervous about the likelihood of my being able to buy a house a few years down the road, or get reasonable loans for grad school. And on a societal level, it kind of makes me want to cross my arms and pout. Why do the automakers get help? It's been obvious for more than a decade that combustible engines are on their way out, but they've been dragging their feet on switching to a type of car that will, in the end, cost the consumer less and may actually sell more in the long run. Why does the financial industry get "rescued?" They seriously messed up in a myriad of ways and spent so much money to do so, it boggles the mind. Then they messed up some more with the money the government gave them to fix it.

So we're doing all of this to prevent companies who made mistakes from suffering the logical consequences of their actions...why, exactly? I know, I know, so the American economy doesn't completely collapse on itself. It still feels wrong, from where I'm standing. And kind of like we're rewarding economic failures for having failed - and then whining about the reality check.

I don't want more tax breaks and I don't need a stimulus check - I pay my taxes without complaint, expect everyone else, individuals and businesses alike, to do the same and all I ask is that if I've paid too much, I get it back sometime in the first half of the following year. Isn't that the way it's supposed to work? What are we really hoping to accomplish, in the long run, by throwing unfathomably large sums of money at businesses and people who have become notorious for financial mismanagement? And what have they done to demonstrate that they're trustworthy enough (I know, what an old-fashioned concept that is!) to deserve it?